Tell us about yourself?
I am Renske, married to the sweetest man on earth, and we have two wonderful adult children and a daughter-in-law. We have a fantastic home base as a family, and this also makes me the happiest being at home with them.
About 20 years ago, due to my weight loss, I had a lot of loose skin on my body but also on my face, which bothered me. I thought I could solve that by filling it up with a permanent filler Bio Alclamid.
In 2016 I started to get pain next to my nose, and a big burning bump appeared in my cheek fold. I began to feel sick, and I was in a lot of pain. I went to the doctor, which frightened me because I initially blamed myself because I chose to get a permanent filler. But the doctor took my story very seriously, and we went to work. The Erasmus hospital, where Dr. Decates and Dr. Velthuis provides selfless consultations for these complaints “legally mutilated” (in addition to their practices) which occur more often than is thought .
After the examination and the ultrasound, the advice was to do nothing but take antibiotics for as long as possible in case of complaints. That meant about three times a year, and since one year, I have been off the antibiotics, and I hope it will stay that way. But the permanent filler has to come out at some point, which will be a process of about a year; it will be removed in phases, and after total healing, it will be filled with body fat. I feel very supported by Dr. Decates and my GP, who took me seriously at the time!
Permanent fillers have been banned in the Netherlands for a while now but be aware. These fillers are still secretly administered, and women also go to countries where it is allowed. Please don’t ever opt for permanent fillers!
If you find yourself in this situation, always seek help and see your doctor; please don’t be ashamed. You can have the fillers removed everywhere these days, but not just like that. Also, ask for a referral from your doctor for the insurance because you are “legally mutilated,” as it is officially called.
If you do opt for fillers, never go for an offer and always go to a registered cosmetic doctor. Get advice first and choose temporary fillers from a knowledgeable doctor; that’s the safest thing. A professional and honest doctor will also send you away if you don’t need any fillers at all.
If readers want to ask me for advice, they can always do so via my Instagram account.
Tell us about your career?
With great pleasure but a lot of wasted energy, I worked at the most prominent Dutch transport company for a long time. I had a lot of responsibility and an excellent salary. I worked seven days a week, and even during my holidays, this continued working until one day I woke up and couldn’t do anything anymore. That what I had feard became truth, I had a burnout. Burnout, ultimately, was one of the good things in my life that happened to me. I learned to choose better for myself, although this is still a big pitfall. I still tend to put myself in last place.
I have been working for the government (UWV) medical affairs for some time now. What actually nobody on Instagram knows is that I work as a civil servant. Three years ago, I started 1 or 2 days a week at a fabulous fashion boutique, and that’s where my passion lies. I used to go to fashion school but life took a different path. It feels good to follow my heart again.
Tell us about marriage and motherhood?
My husband and I were in class together at primary school. My first memory of him is not very nice. He unbuttoned my denim skirt (which my mother had made on sewing lessons) so that I was standing in my underpants in the schoolyard. A while later, when we were at a pub, there was that click and courtship.
I got pregnant, and we were overjoyed until I no longer felt life in my belly until eight months of pregnancy. When we arrived at the hospital, we were told that our baby was no longer alive. We were sent home by the gynecologist (with the intention that this would settle in with us) the next day I was due to give birth. It was the worst day of our lives.
After the baby was delivered, it was still placed on my stomach, which was a tough choice, but afterward, it was the best choice to accept the sad reality. The same gynecologist was present at the birth of my other two children. When I became pregnant with our daughter, we decided not to have any more children. Then unexpectedly, I got pregnant again and gave birth to a healthy son. Due to the loss of our first child, I have always been and still am an overprotective mother, which is quite (very) difficult for my children. I think they don’t understand why I am like this until they have children of their own.
My youngest left home last June, and now it’s just my husband and me. The most challenging thing for me is losing control over my children, and perhaps even more difficult is finding a new life with your partner after the children leave home. My husband is my rock, and we love each other a lot, so I think we’ll be fine together.
What do you consider your greatest achievement?
My children! I was never slim, but after my first pregnancy, I weighed 118 kilos. That is too heavy and not healthy. I’ve lost 45 pounds. Nowadays I gained some weight again, but that’s fine. It took me about four years to lose the weight I wanted back then. I went to bed very early to stop snacking and exercised six days a week until I drove to the gym crying and stopped immediately. Now I find my only sporting activity in yoga.
How I got overweight; Due to my parents’ marital problems, I was sent to my grandparents in Ireland when I was five years old, and I lived there for almost two years. My grandmother cared for me with lots of love and nourishment, and I came back as a much too fat child. After that, it has always been that way. I was never bullied in school, and I never felt different or ugly. When I look at old pictures, I always see a happy child and a happy young woman.
During my career at the transport company, I was an honest but callous businesswoman. People were literally afraid of me. I also thought something negative about everyone and made no secret of it. My burnout changed me, and it has made me a different person. I started to look at people differently and then changed my behavior. I learned that if you are positive towards others, you also get positive in return. Also, you get a lot of energy from positivity.
What is your fantasy version of your older self, let’s say 80 years old?
I want to be a grandma! But first, my children have to be ready and lucky to have children, which is immediately my fear. My ultimate dream is that my husband and I spend the winter months abroad and that my children and grandchildren visit us. I see myself with good friends drinking endless wine, dressed up on the terrace. I enjoy seeing older ladies enjoying life. It makes me so happy to see a couple behind the walker chatting together.
What Would You say to your younger self?
Be nicer, friendlier, and more helpful to others, and don’t forget about yourself.
What do you do to stay positive both mentally and physically?
Be positive! I think that being positive in life also makes you healthier.
Latest Google search?
The weather in Sevilla. I love going abroad so much!
What is your age, and how old do you feel?
I’m 52, and that’s how I feel. Yes, I occasionally do botox and have my belly skin removed, and I had my eyelids lifted. I don’t want to look younger, but I want to look fresh.
