Krista’s menopause story

Denise Boomkens·
Perimenopause
··4 min read

When I was younger, I didn’t really dread menopause. The end of the monthly drama of menstruation seemed like a relief.

And since I was always cold, I thought, “Bring on those hot flashes!” Unfortunately, it didn’t go as smoothly as I had imagined.

First, I had heavy periods that sometimes lasted for weeks when I was fifty. This wasn’t what I had envisioned, but eventually, the heavy bleeding stopped.

Some women find it difficult to say goodbye to their fertility. I had been sterilized when I was younger, so that was no longer an issue. I had already said goodbye to my fertility. But then the hot flashes started. At first, it was almost amusing—just shedding some clothes, and done. But soon, the hot flashes began occurring at the most inconvenient times. A hot flash cannot be ignored: I don’t just feel hot. When I have a hot flash, sweat pours off my body, and I can’t think clearly anymore.

The nights are also horror; whether it is freezing or not, I get hot flushes. Often multiple times a night. After such a hot flush, I feel cold, which literally costs me a lot of energy. It makes me sad. The hardest thing for me is when it seems like no one in my surroundings has it as bad as me. I recently met a woman going through the same thing and felt somewhat comforted by that. And that’s also the reason I want to share it here on AndBloom. It helps me know I am not alone in this, especially at night.

I have tried everything to fix this, supplements and hormone therapy, special diets, and swimming. Nothing turns out to be as powerful as my own thoughts. It sounds so cliché, but accepting it as it ultimately works best for me. As shitty as it is, if I don’t “fight” it, it’s usually less fierce. Then I get softer and prefer to myself.

Due to the intense hot flashes and the energy that costs me, I have lost a lot of weight. That also often happens to those who would rather not lose weight. I was already slim and slimmer was not mandatory for me. The medical examinations I underwent showed nothing underlying except menopause. So it turns out that you can get a big blow from “just” that. In recent months I have been on a specialized eating program that many would envy … but gaining weight remains a significant problem.

You first need a little energy for a positive mind with positive thoughts. Energy I often don’t have because of the broken nights because of night sweats. Nowadays, I get my energy from making something beautiful and creative or being outside in nature. I like to listen to beautiful music and think of my grown-up children. And, yes, I take the time to eat well.

You can always climb back up in a downward spiral, but the start is difficult. Actually, my body hasn’t changed that much, except for my skin and my hair, of course. But I’m not so concerned with wrinkles; I usually like them. And I like my gray hair. Next week I get Acupuncture treatment against the night sweats. I hope for a positive result. I turned sixty last month, and I hope to reach the other side of the tunnel soon.

To the women who recognize themselves in my story, I would like to say, hang on!

With love,

Krista

Here’s a brief exploration of the symptoms you described and some suggestions that might help manage them:

 Heavy Periods

The transition to menopause often involves irregular and heavy periods. This is due to hormonal fluctuations, particularly the decline in estrogen and progesterone. It’s good to hear that this phase eventually ended for you, but for many, it can be quite disruptive.

Management Tips:

  • Diet and Nutrition: Maintaining a balanced diet rich in iron and vitamins can help manage the fatigue and anemia that can accompany heavy bleeding.
  • Medical Treatments: Hormonal treatments or medications like tranexamic acid can reduce blood loss. Consulting with a healthcare provider is essential to find the right approach for you.
Hot Flushes

Hot flushes are one of the most common symptoms of menopause. They can vary from mild to severe and can occur unexpectedly, often disrupting daily activities and sleep.

Management Tips:

  • Layering Clothes: Wearing layers can help you quickly adjust to changing body temperatures.
  • Cool Environments: Keeping your living space cool, using fans, and having cold drinks can alleviate symptoms.
  • Stress Reduction: Practices like yoga, meditation, and deep breathing exercises can help manage stress, which can trigger hot flushes.
  • Herbal Remedies: Some women find relief with herbal supplements like black cohosh, though it’s important to consult with a healthcare provider before starting any new treatment.
  • Medical Treatments: Hormone Replacement Therapy (HRT) can be very effective for some women, though it comes with its own risks and benefits that need to be evaluated with a healthcare professional.
Cognitive Impact

Hot flushes can affect cognitive functions, leading to brain fog and difficulty concentrating, as you mentioned.

Management Tips:

  • Mindfulness and Relaxation Techniques: Techniques like mindfulness, relaxation exercises, and cognitive behavioral strategies can help improve focus and reduce the cognitive impact of hot flushes.
  • Hydration:Staying well-hydrated can help your body manage temperature changes better.
  • Healthy Sleep Habits: Ensuring good sleep hygiene can mitigate some cognitive symptoms. This includes maintaining a regular sleep schedule and creating a restful sleeping environment.
Emotional and Psychological Impact

Menopause can bring about emotional changes, partly due to the hormonal changes and partly due to the adjustment to this new phase of life.

Management Tips:

  • Support Groups: Joining support groups or talking to others going through the same experience can provide comfort and practical tips.
  • Professional Help: Therapy or counseling can be beneficial in managing mood swings and emotional changes.
 Final Thoughts

It’s important to remember that each woman’s experience with menopause is unique. What works for one person might not work for another, so it’s crucial to explore different strategies and find what suits you best. Consulting with healthcare providers for personalized advice and treatment options is always a good step.

Your resilience and ability to adapt to these changes are commendable. By sharing your story, you help others feel less alone in their experiences and encourage them to seek the help and support they need.

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10 Comments

  1. I want to thank you for so eloquently sharing your experience with menopause. It’s so gratifying to find like minded women as fellow warriors in this game of life. X

    1. Thank you so much for leaving this beautiful message for Krista. Love Dee

  2. Thank you Krista for sharing your menopause story with us, I really appreciate your honest and open story. As you wrote in your story you are really helping me and I do feel less alone. x

  3. Thank you so much for your sharing your story, Krista. You are lifting up other women with your candid words and your beauty and resilience shines even brighter! And thank you, Dee, for creating this delightful space! xoxo Mandy

  4. Thank you for your honest writing. Women don’t talk about this enough and it is so helpful to do so. Hot flashes can really blank out my brain and concentration. I never thought about acupuncture.

  5. I am 40. I am going through chemo and it’s brought on these things: the night sweats are insane. I don’t sleep well unless I take a tablet. I don’t want to take them so I wake up so often boiling hot then cold over and over. I don’t have my period any longer and I am going for a mastectomy soon. Reading your story is encouraging. Thank you for sharing. I know I am not alone and that is comforting

  6. Krista, did you try Hormone replacement. I did, and they helped but I put on weight and stopped taking them. So I’m left with the heat and it is debilitating! Thank you sharing.

  7. I’m 52 and this year has been a nightmare. I thought I would take after my Mother. None of the women in my family have experienced anything close to what I’m going through. My girlfriends who are beginning to experience symptoms say it’s not like what I’m experiencing. You do, you feel alone like the odd duck, why am I having such a terrible time? So I’m glad you shared what you have experienced. I too have lost weight going through the constant hot and cold of night sweats and chills and not sleeping. The hot flashes bring with them a nauseous feeling that wakes me up to anxiety as well as stripping down and turning on of the fan. When will it end?

  8. Thank you so much for sharing your story.
    I went into the menopause at 42 years, I am 52 now. I still have hot flushes, after 21:00 and first thing in the morning. Also as you mentioned, my thoughts are sometimes triggers, especially at night when I am tired, I tend to feel a little anxious generally.
    The things I’ve found that help are: cutting out gluten, dairy, refined sugar and alcohol, eating fresh, whole foods. I try to take regular exercise: strength training, HIIT and yoga 2-3 times a week ( to protect my bones) going to bed at the same time every night. I drink a blend of my own calming tea with chamomile, dandelion root, licorice root and fennel seeds.
    I work part time, desk based but try to go to my allotment most afternoons, growing flowers makes me happy. The menopause sometimes requires a whole lifestyle change which has taken me 10 years to adapt to. I weigh 4kg more than I’d like to and no matter what I eat or don’t eat, how much I track my macros, I can’t seem to lose any weight at all.
    It makes me happy to read about other women’s experiences with the big M because I don’t feel so alone with it . I’m glad women are finally talking more about it, maybe it will help the next generation of women to be better prepared. Forewarned is forearmed. Every person experiences different symptoms and some sail through it without any changes except loss of their menstruation.
    Whatever happens, try not to let it get you down, there’s still plenty to be happy about x ❤️

    1. Good advise, I’m going to try some of these that I’m not doing yet.

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