I’m a 53-year-old WOMAN … who’s navigating middle age on her own terms! I’m the mother to two wonderful teenage boys, 16 and 17, whom I’m incredibly proud of. Life has not always been easy for them, but they continue to amaze me with their resilience and good hearts.
Underneath this smiling face is a story of survival that I hope to share in more detail in the future! But for now, in a nutshell …
After leaving a bad marriage nearly eight years ago, I’m now at the beginning stages of getting divorced. This, I know, will be like the marriage-painful!
Sharing my story of my divorce and my marriage is my journey which needs to be communicated to give others strength in the same position!
My father has Alzheimer’s, and I became his sole carer for three years / the most demanding role of my life! Even with my Social work background, it was an emotional rollercoaster … this wretched condition robbed me of the only person who ever loved me unconditionally! My father.
Alzheimer’s is such a cruel disease.
My beloved father is still with us … Being looked after in a fantastic nursing home. However, this is my toughest test, and the guilt is unreal, but I know I’m doing my best. My father, the sweet, generous soul he is … would totally understand!
Tell us more about your aging journey.
My aging journey ….. has become my time to be unapologetically ME!
For all the reasons I’ve mentioned…… and there’s more, lol. I decided at the age of 50 to take control of the narrative that life has dealt me ….. don’t get me wrong, I’ve had fantastic moments that I orchestrated out-of-shit situations! That’s my strength … taking lemons and making lemonade ? and aging has given me the insight and confidence to own this as the superpower it is!
Aging is a privilege … Don’t fear it; embrace it! It’s a period of time when you come into your own power.
What would you write if you could write a letter to your younger self?
Understand that people do not treat you like you treat them.
Realize that some people see kindness as a weakness, so have boundaries like a muuther f@@@ker.
The world is full of opportunities … Go explore!
What is your message to women worldwide?
Aging is a privilege … Don’t fear it; embrace it! It’s a period of time when you come into your own power. Own it … Stop caring what others think and start being unapologetically you!
What’s the best/worst part of getting older for you?
Best thing? I’m 53 years old, and although embarking on the beginning stages of a divorce, I feel excited at what life can offer! I no longer worry about what people think, I’m trusting and believing in myself, and it’s sooooo liberating!
Worst thing? Menopause…… The bloody brain fog is unreal, and I’m on HRT! HRT has improved the symptoms, but still, it’s debilitating! Losing friends and family …
Fantasy version of my older self?
There’s a group of women ( and men) who embody how I want to be in the future! They are part of the Advanced Styled Movement … And I adore them all. However, my girly crushes are @Detroitstylesylvia @marsha_music and @theherberdasherist! These ladies show youngsters like me how it’s done!
So my fantasy older self would be …. All these women with a massive sprinkling of the late great Queen…. Vivienne Westwood!
What do you do for work?
On my 50th birthday … I launched … PlanetJQ and TUNEWHORE My 50th gift to myself! My time to do something just for ME! I stopped resisting my creative calling and finally embraced it! I’m now curating my own brand …
PlanetJQ … Where I combine my thoughts, women empowerment, self-development, snippets of good music (TUNEWHORE), and my fashion! I suppose a bit like a magazine! I also offer a personal Styled by service.
My clothes reflect my personal style and are handpicked by me. Everything is vintage because sustainability is essential to me. I celebrate curves because I know how hard it is to find fabulous vintage clothes in larger sizes as a curvy woman! I also stock really cool pieces for gents as well. My finds are for sale and also to rent!
My sister’s label Tunewhore … which is precisely what it says! Is my label for people who love tunes ( music)
Favorite thing to do when no one is around?
Watching mindless TV … with a family bag of Walkers cheese and onion crisps! Accompanied by a glass or two of red wine!
Best new discovery
Social media ??♀️
I’m such a fraud … Until 2020, I was very anti-social media! I thought it was a fake artificial world full of Kardashian wannabes (nothing wrong with Kardashian wannabes but just not my bag). Still, my fashion brand’s launch and the Covid lockdowns led me here! And what a fantastic journey it’s been so far!
What is your age, and how old do you feel?
53 years old and proud of every single one of them years.
Mentally I feel 35 … still young but experienced.
Sometimes my body feels older … Aches and pains in the morning, menopausal stuff … but I go to the gym regularly, taking yoga and strength training classes!
My exercise helps me physically and mentally, and I’ve come to rely on it as a coping mechanism. I love music and dancing; the dance floor is my spiritual home! This energizes me, contributes to feeling relevant, and, most importantly, makes me happy!