My heart has two kinds of days. I have days when I walk the streets with my eyes wide open, curious, cheerful, and outgoing.
On days like that, I see almost everything and everyone around me, men, women, young, old. On days like that, I give compliments to people that catch my attention. I chat with a stranger and flirt with the postman. On days like that, I smile at the world, and the world smiles back.
Then there are my more introverted days, and I walk the street with eyes wide shut. On days like that, I just don’t want to be seen. Those are the days that I am comfortable with being invisible, it’s like being on “private mode.” I don’t want to look at the world, and I don’t want the world to look at me. I have no particular mode preference. It totally depends on how I wake up in the morning. I feel comfortable with both versions of myself, and I allow myself to be whatever version of myself I wish to be.
Although the extrovert version is much more fun, my introvert side also has a right to exist. Sometimes, I wake up in a particular mode that changes during the day, more regularly from visible to invisible than the other way around, however. But I also have days when it is visa versa. This gives me the certainty that it is a choice to smile at the world, with eyes wide open and positivity. Or not (if preferred), because it can also be liberating to move around inconspicuously, as long as it is a personal choice.
The eye chooses what it wants to see. I love the phrase, ‘you are not invisible; they are blind.’ I think we need to learn to look at ourselves differently. And at others. – AndBloom
I had read it before and would like to mention it in this article. Did you know that research shows that especially older women consciously “adapt”? They adapt out of fear that other women will judge them. They are afraid to be judged if they behave, dress, or look different or special. Why? I wonder.
Many women around me confirmed two crucial benefits of aging:
- we feel less insecure and more confident about ourselves.
- we care less about what others think of us.
Number 1? Yes! Number 2? Really?
Older women should be powerful examples for younger generations. We should encourage them to individualize and be who they want to be as if their futures depend on it. If I could send a message to my younger self, I would tell myself to believe in ME. To grab the reins and demonstrate my presence to the world, without holding back. And now, in my 40s, I am trying to spread the word of beauty and strength.
Ladies: you were raised to be kind, nice, and to put others first. Are you still waiting for permission to live? Stop right now. Take off your shoes and walk on the lawn. Toss your hair, wear that red lipstick, forget what someone else thinks of you. You are not invisible until you choose to be.
